Which Is More Painful: Being Unemployed or Having a Lousy Job?

I came across a topic discussion: which is more painful, being unemployed or having a lousy job?

Some people say being unemployed is the most painful because there's no income, no sense of security, and it brings anxiety.

Others say a lousy job is more painful because you're draining your soul every day.

So, which is really more unbearable? I'd say in the short term, being unemployed is more painful, but in the long run, a lousy job is more deadly.

I don't have much personal experience in this area. I once worked in an electronics factory during college. It was a job that was extremely numb, mechanical, and time - squeezing, which really killed people's ideas and hopes.

Many of my friends work less than half a year a year. Fortunately, they're still young and in a state where one person's full stomach means the whole family is fed, so they can get by.

The real difficulty comes after getting married. Maybe you're no longer allowed to be unemployed and have to be forced to choose a lousy job.

Let's talk about these two states in detail.

01/ Being Unemployed: Losing Order and Facing Pressure

When a person loses their job, the pain doesn't come from "having nothing to do", but from the sudden lack of structure in life.

Before, you knew when to get up, when to go to work, and when to eat. Now you can arrange your whole day freely, but you just don't know where to start.

You thought you wanted freedom, but real freedom is a huge test of self - discipline.

During the period of unemployment, you might:

• Go to bed later and later.
• Start to doubt yourself.
• See others making progress while you're anxiously spinning in place.

This isn't failure; it's a transition period from being "defined by others" to "self - defining".

The pain is just because you haven't found a new order. That is, you need to find your own path, where you're going and what you're going to do.

The pressure can be divided into two situations: before and after getting married.

Before getting married, the pressure is much less. It's mostly about your own view of yourself and your parents' view. It doesn't cause substantial financial pressure within a certain period.

After getting married, substantial pressure may come in a short time, say 1 - 2 months. Sometimes, it's not just about being yourself; it requires practical solutions.

02/ A Lousy Job: Losing Your Soul and Getting Hurt

But if you choose to stay in a lousy job, the pain is more hidden and "chronic".

You start to "pretend":

• Pretend to be interested in reports.
• Pretend to be working hard.
• Pretend to be growing.

In fact, you're consuming your attention and dignity every day. Sometimes, it's not the work that's tiring, but the act of pretending.

What's more dangerous is that a lousy job will make you lose the courage to start over.

Because it gives you a little salary and a faint sense of security. It's just not enough for you to leave, but enough for you to keep hanging on.

Classmates who have worked for a few years should know that they're really afraid of having a physical examination, worried about health problems.

Health problems, although affected by age, diet, and daily routine.

But I really think a lot of them are the additional costs brought by a job. Work pressure, emotional depression, and physical exhaustion from overtime can also greatly affect diet and daily routine.

They say there's a "work flavor". After going to work, there's no more light in your eyes.

03/ Choosing and Not Choosing: It Depends on Ability

The solution to this problem isn't on the surface but outside the question.

The answers to many questions are like this. For example, if you want to open a lock on a door, how can you find the key?

You may not know how to answer, but one thing is certain: the key is unlikely to be on the lock.

This question isn't really asking you to make a choice but to find the answer behind it through this choice.

For example, why isn't there an option for a "good job"?

There may not be many good jobs, but there aren't none. Maybe there aren't 100% good ones, but 70% good ones might exist.

If you really can't find one, create it yourself, and all this requires you to take action.

04/ How to Change When You're in Such a Situation?

Don't stay in any state that drains your energy for a long time.

For those who are unemployed, first establish a "new rhythm". Set a goal for yourself and achieve a little bit every day.

For those in a lousy job, first regain the "sense of control". Don't quit immediately, but start to accumulate transferable skills.

In general, take back the control of your life and move forward step by step.

Gradually see yourself growing and slowly get rid of the sense of powerlessness.

Being unemployed makes you fear the future; a lousy job makes you tired of the present.

The price of freedom is anxiety, and the price of stability is numbness.

What we need to do is find the rhythm we want.

Daily Reading & Writing by Xiaolu 10/07/2025 [Day 763]