The Truth: You Don't Hate Going to Work as Much as You Think

Do You Have Extreme Feelings Towards Something?

Do you have things that you extremely hate or extremely love?

"Being moderate" is a good way to describe most of us. Most people are in this state, and many things are just okay for them, like going to work.

Few people have extreme emotions towards work. There aren't many who truly hate going to work, and also few who really love it.

You may say, "How can there be someone who doesn't hate going to work?" But I'm talking about extreme cases - hating it so much that they can't stand it physically and mentally, to the point of having physical reactions.

Even if a job has good pay, no overtime, and low stress, some people still feel uncomfortable. In short, it's the lifestyle itself that makes them feel bad, not that they'll do the job just because of high pay, good benefits, and an easy workload.

People who truly hate going to work will usually find ways to escape, like starting their own business or becoming an entrepreneur. They won't stay in the workplace or as an employee for long.

There are also few people who are extremely passionate about going to work. What people love is usually something specific, like getting a sense of value and presence from work, or they've just gotten used to it and can't live without it.

Many people feel lost after retirement. It's not because they love going to work, but because work or an organizational environment can bring a sense of presence and value.

That's why many people look for something to do after retirement, even if they don't need the money. Many old people are like this. Their family conditions are good, but they still actively find things to do, or they'll feel bored.

People's intelligence, ability to act, physical strength, health, and wealth are basically in a normal distribution. There are more people in the middle and fewer at the two ends.

This also causes a problem. Since most people don't have things they particularly like or are passionate about, they're likely to give up easily. That is, they have "three - minute enthusiasm", "intermittent efforts", and "work by fits and starts".

Maybe one day you read an article or watched a short video and got really excited. You wanted to do something, like learning the guitar, the piano, going skiing, learning a sport, mastering a skill, getting a certificate, taking the postgraduate entrance exam, reading a book, or setting up a street stall to make money.

Everyone has these kinds of thoughts, and I'm no exception. But according to my experience, these thoughts usually don't last long. Most of the time, they won't last more than a week and will disappear within three days.

It's because these things are actually not that important to them.

For example, would you get up in the middle of the night to cook something yourself or go far away to buy it just because you really wanted to eat it? Would you even spend hours and go all over the city just for a bite?

When something is not a must - do or must - avoid thing for you, it's okay not to eat a certain thing today. Eating it will make you happier, but it doesn't matter if you don't.

We have this attitude towards many things. Actually, it's not bad. This kind of mindset makes our life more relaxed and free, with a higher tolerance for mistakes, and we won't be so worried or tired.

But if you have this attitude towards everything, you'll be in a state of "having no desires or pursuits".

Who is the scariest person? It's the one with "no desires or pursuits". Here, "no desires or pursuits" doesn't mean having no goals at all, but having almost no strong feelings.

I use "strong feelings" to describe extreme hatred or extreme love. Both of these count as strong feelings, which are the strong attitudes of "must do" or "must not do". Only with such strong thoughts can you be motivated to keep taking action and really find ways to achieve your goals.

Here, "having no desires or pursuits" mostly means that if you encounter big difficulties, like something is very hard to achieve or a goal is difficult to reach, you may choose to give up, or you can accept giving up and calmly accept the result. You'll choose an easier goal instead.

This kind of mindset is not a bad thing. People won't over - think or be too纠结. They have a peaceful mind, with few regrets of "loving something but not getting it", and not many strong feelings or unhappiness. They seem more laid - back.

But this attitude may also show that a person lacks motivation, has no pursuits, no ideals, and is not willing to work hard. People may even think that they just muddle along, lie flat, and have no future.

Everything has two sides. When you accept someone's certain characteristics or personality, there will surely be another side to them.

If you like someone who is laid - back, free - spirited, and easy - going, you have to accept that they won't be very persistent about many things. They can accept many things and can even do without them.

Back to ourselves, there's no such thing as good or bad personality, only different characteristics.

To judge whether something is good or bad, we need a reference. This reference is your actions, personality, and understanding. We need to see if they can help you achieve your goals, if they're beneficial, and if they have advantages.

Only by clarifying what your advantages, disadvantages, and flaws are can you judge whether your personality, thoughts, and behavior patterns are more beneficial or harmful to a certain thing.

Similarly, a certain personality may be more beneficial in your career, but in your relationships, social life, or interpersonal relationships, it may be more harmful.

So, we can't simply judge whether a personality is good or bad. We should combine it with specific things. Instead of using "good" or "bad", it's better to use "advantages" and "disadvantages" because these words are more neutral, without judgment, and more objective.

You can apply your personality and behavior habits to different things, like work, life, doing things, making money, learning hobbies. Analyze which aspects are beneficial and which have drawbacks, and think about how to adjust.

You can adjust by yourself or with the help of others. For example, you can ask others for help, outsource things to others, or cooperate. You can also find a way that suits you better, magnify your advantages, and reduce the impact of your disadvantages.

Daily Reading & Writing by Xiaolu 08/31/2025 [Day 726]